Canticles of the Unhomed
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
Finished
So I just finished my short story. It is to be published in the speculative fiction magazine Specopolis. It is a new, small speculative fiction/science fiction magazine that contracted me to write a short story for them. They sent me a couple of pieces they were thinking about publishing, and as I read the type of stuff they had, I noticed that it was mostly cyberpunk-ish/telepath kind of stuff. Not really my cup of tea, so I decided that I should give them something a bit more... philosophic. So I wrote a story about the fear of death; this is played out in the format of a highly advanced race that over literally trillions of years builds this artifact that will preserve them and all "True Life" past the end of the universe. They decide that they are not going to allow trillions of years of advancement and accomplishment be randomly destroyed when the universe ends. The idea is that this race and their need to survive mirrors our own fear of death and sometimes fanatical need to persist. Of course, the real point is fate - can you struggle against your fate; can you change it or overcome it? An added complication is that every living being, everywhere in the universe, after they die, their soul, or Voice, is captured by this race and placed in storage until the end of the universe. After the Big Crunch and the subsequent Big Bang, the race will then use these Voices to seed new planets, spreading life across the universe billions of years before it did the last time. The twist comes when one Voice "wakes up" before its time and starts asking questions. It allows for a couple of good conversations about fate between the being and the aliens. Now, as for whether or not the aliens actually succeed in surviving the end of the universe... you'll have to read the story to find out. The chances of you finding a copy of Specopolis in print is pretty slim; I think they would publish the story on their website once the issue actually goes to print, though. However, I don't know which issue they plan to publish the story in. I will keep you all posted.
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
The Calling
So last night Chuck and I had a really excellent conversation over cheap pasta with a couple of people from Sol Cafe. We started to talk about "calling." This is an idea that I got from Joe; the idea that we need to approach Sol Cafe from the perspective of a "calling," rather than a "hobby." As I satrted to think more about this, more it became obvious to me. To allow Sol Cafe to succeed, the shift that we have to make is to thinking about Sol as a calling. The first reason for this is that Sol is going to require much more than just some regaulr church. In many "traditional" churches there is a certain amount of... momentum, whether that be tradition, history, or just plain numbers. Strangely, we have none of those three at Sol Cafe. WIthout that momentum to keep us going in the midst of transition or upheaval, we will need to step up all our efforts. We cannot afford spectators. And to ask people to invest at this level, requires a calling. A special invitation from God to a task, because it will be hard and arduous, and it will not always be fun. That calling needs to come from God because in the midst of the trial, you MUST believe that there is a goal, or purpose. The other reason is that it will require special measures of grace and strength from God to sacrifice. It is interesting to think about sacrificing to attend church. Some might think that it is not our place to be asking people to give things up to come to church, or help the church survive. We tend to think that people are busy, or that they are already giving as much as they can, etc. But now I wonder if we might need to start calling people to sacrifice for the sake of Sol Cafe. Of course, I have no idea what that means or what it will look like.
So I am thinking about "calling" this week in preparation for talking about it for service on Sunday. The passage that is defining my thinking is Ephesians 4:1-6, which says, "As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit–just as you were called to one hope when you were called–one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all." The interesting thing in these verses are the words, "kaleo," "eklethete," and "parakalo." These are all iterations of the greek verb "kaleo," which means to "call, or invite," but also has the implications of "giving a name." I can appreciate how this passage connects calling with community. I think there is something here.
Thoughts?
Thoughts?
Monday, January 24, 2005
The Dawning of the New Era?
So this Sunday was the first for Sol Cafe without our pastor, Rob. If you didn't know, our Pastor resigned a couple of weeks back because, basicially, he was burnt out. In the process we have lost some other, additional leadership, and now Sol Cafe is sort of floundering, waiting for a new leadership vision to evolve. This is not inherently healthy. We are not even sure if Sol Cafe should continue. Sure, everyone at Sol Cafe is really positive that they want it to continue, but I am not sure if everyone will be willing to commit to what is necessary for Sol Cafe to continue in a healthy, Christ-centric way. Personally, if we just want to continue as we have been, not thinking we need to change, then I have no desire to be here; since we'll only be back to where we are now only a year or so later. This time it will be ME that is burnt out. We have a leadership core, and we are striving to put together a leadership model that is good for us and that honor's Christ in our context. But, fundamentally, I feel a littel trepidation. That being said, I am nonetheless feeling very positive and hopeful. I believe in our leadership team; I know that each of them are passionate about Sol Cafe and committed to continually seeking God's face in the process of working this out. I listen to the stories of people in the congregation and I am encouraged and edified as I hear, very clearly, how God is at work in their lives. What encourages me the most is that THEY see it as much as I do. I am surrounded by people that love me and support me; Shirley, Chuck, Jayson, and more. Their presence in my life has kept me on an even keel. They have made me feel loved even when I have felt the most alone.
So I guess I could say that I feel cautiously optimistic? I don't know if that is the right term or not. Perhaps I should consult with my contact in the field of Communication and Rhetoric. :) If nothing else, I will say that this whole process has really reformed my prayer life. I came to the conclusion that I MUST give this over to God; to do otherwise only invites insanity.
So I guess I could say that I feel cautiously optimistic? I don't know if that is the right term or not. Perhaps I should consult with my contact in the field of Communication and Rhetoric. :) If nothing else, I will say that this whole process has really reformed my prayer life. I came to the conclusion that I MUST give this over to God; to do otherwise only invites insanity.
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
What a Day
So I lost my cellphone yesterday. I was coming out of a job interview and I think it fell out of my pocket. So, no cell phone, at a time when I need to be in communication with people, moreso than any other time. Then, this morning I was at the gym and I was talking to this girl while I was on the crosstrainer. As I was finishing, I was concentrating on talking to her and I fell off the machine, flat on my back, knocking the breath out of me. Smooth. Then I miss my bus getting to the cafe, so I am late taking over from the morning guy. Oh well, maybe I should just go home, bury my head under the blankets and try to forget about today.
So I have been interviewing for a job at Ikon Office Solutions, in their Order Coordination dept. It is a good job with good pay, good hours and great perks. I had my first interview last week, they liked me enough to bring me back for another interview, which was yesterday. I thought it went really well. They told me that I should know by today or tomorrow. Of course, they can't phone me because my cell phone is lying somewhere in a snow bank. ANyway, I hope I get the job. It will be nice to making an income that approaches the national average. :) And no shift work!
So I have been interviewing for a job at Ikon Office Solutions, in their Order Coordination dept. It is a good job with good pay, good hours and great perks. I had my first interview last week, they liked me enough to bring me back for another interview, which was yesterday. I thought it went really well. They told me that I should know by today or tomorrow. Of course, they can't phone me because my cell phone is lying somewhere in a snow bank. ANyway, I hope I get the job. It will be nice to making an income that approaches the national average. :) And no shift work!
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Geekboy Lord of the Universe
I am the Geekboy Lord of the Universe. I have published pictures on my blog of a starship from a book I wrote. You don't get much more geeky than that. Nonetheless, I am extremely proud of the images, produced by Adam Dreher. Simply incredible. It is really exciting to see something from your imagination actually appear in front of you in full 3D. Hey, at least I am getting paid to write. That is something. Its not like I am just some fan in his basement writing some Star Trek story about how Picard finally expresses his true love for Beverly Crusher while simultaneously fighting off a resurrected Kahn Singh while matching wits in the newest appearance of Q.
So, in the meantime I am trying to focus on writing that short story. The short story format is difficult for me, but I look forward to the challenge. I think the premise of the story is going to be about the first alien culture who realize that eventually the universe will end and all the billions of years of their accomplishments will be destroyed utterly, so they embark on a plan to construct a device that will act as a life preserver for them and other life they choose to save. It will deal with themes of death, fear of death, resurrection and the end of all things. Part of the challenge is to do a story like this justice in only >6000 words. As well, the technical and scientific research is also daunting. I have an astrophysicist friend of mine helping me, but the questions that I am asking her are stumping her, so we'll need to work through these ideas. Maybe I'll post a bit once I have a few words on the page.
By the way, be sure to check out my friend Rachel's blog. It's in my link section.
Still cold. -36. Still wearing shorts. And why not? Will wearing pants all of a sudden make it feel like its 20 degrees?
So, in the meantime I am trying to focus on writing that short story. The short story format is difficult for me, but I look forward to the challenge. I think the premise of the story is going to be about the first alien culture who realize that eventually the universe will end and all the billions of years of their accomplishments will be destroyed utterly, so they embark on a plan to construct a device that will act as a life preserver for them and other life they choose to save. It will deal with themes of death, fear of death, resurrection and the end of all things. Part of the challenge is to do a story like this justice in only >6000 words. As well, the technical and scientific research is also daunting. I have an astrophysicist friend of mine helping me, but the questions that I am asking her are stumping her, so we'll need to work through these ideas. Maybe I'll post a bit once I have a few words on the page.
By the way, be sure to check out my friend Rachel's blog. It's in my link section.
Still cold. -36. Still wearing shorts. And why not? Will wearing pants all of a sudden make it feel like its 20 degrees?
More of the new design.
More of the new design.
These are the new design. Better? Worse? Do you care?
This is the new design, more organic, more sleek. Thoughts?
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
The Salt Mine
So I had a job interview today. I thought it was time that I move on and take a step back from the Cafe and try different things. So I interviewed for this job with Ikon Office Machines as Western Canadian Order Coordinator. Wow. Basically it would be me who would be responsible for making sure that companies got the machines that they ordered and so on. Its a regular 9-5 mid-level paper pusher kind of job, which is pretty much what I was looking for. I'd be making approx 31K/yr which, while peanuts, is more than ample for my needs. The interview was very positive and I move on to the next level of interviewing sometime later in the week I think. Here's hoping.
It is cold here today. -30. Windchill taking it to -40. But, I'm still wearing shorts, dammit. Take that winter, you bastard.
It is cold here today. -30. Windchill taking it to -40. But, I'm still wearing shorts, dammit. Take that winter, you bastard.
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
Another angle of the Heavy Destroyer. Again, by Adam Dreher.
This is the Invictus-class Heavy Destroyer, foreward elevation. Insanely sick graphics by Adam Dreher
Where Has the Time Gone?
Has it really been that long since I have blogged. Oh, my poor readers! How devastated you must have been without my musings! (If only.)
Much has happened, and I have been barely able to touch a keyboard, let alone organize my thoughts into something resembling coherency. So I guess I'll just fill everyone in.
1. The Pastor of the Sol Cafe has resigned. Last Sunday he announced that effective Jan 16 he would no longer be our pastor. Much turmoil ensues. Our community is already reeling from internal tension and full of hurting people (nothing unordinary about that) and many people are leaving or thinking about leaving. Rob feels tired and burnt out. He has been doing Sol Cafe fulltime for six years, and he and his family can do no more. This leaves a considerable leadership vacuum in Sol Cafe, and has forced us to ask the question, "Can we survive without Rob?" If the answer to that is no, then it might be more healthy for us to just end it.
This is tough for me, since Sol Cafe is the first church, including the one I pastored, that I truly care about. But, you know what? I'm tired too. I am not sure that I want to continue. I know that the coming months at Sol will eat my soul alive, but the alternative is worse. So I am neatly trapped. IN the meantime, since the announcement of Rob's resignation, I have been busy meeting with people to gauge feelings and try to encourage and motivate people to think and pray more deeply about what Sol Cafe means to them, where they see the hand of God, and where their own committment is. This has been difficult and draining for me. As for my own heart, I am prepared to go either way. If Sol ends, I can walk away with a measure of peace. If Sol continues, I am willing to commit everything to making sure it works, to rebuilding our community. However, a friend told me that to expect change without changing our behavior is absurd. That is a good point. How can expect Sol to be better this time without making a fundamental change?
2. Earlier this fall I hurt my back really badly. I was bed-ridden for almost a month. I literally could not move, they were going to operate on my back, etc. During that month, NO ONE came to see me, NO ONE called. I felt utterly isolated, completely alone. It got to the point where I had a breakdown. Of course, I never called anyone to come over, and Shirley did come over plenty of times, and she called and so on. However, no one else from my church did. That really hurt me. Shirley has noted that since I have recovered from the injury I have changed in some way, that somehow this injury has really affected me. When she said that I really resonated with what she was saying. I could feel the difference in me twixt the summer and now. I didn't like it. I don't like what I have changed into. So it forces me to ask, how have I changed? How is this affecting everything from my relationship with Shirley to Sol Cafe, to my job, writing and so on? Not to mention my spiritual life. And most importantly, how do I get beyond it? Shirley suggested that the cause was that I felt utterly betrayed by the community. For me community has always been the core of my beliefs, and my beliefs about community form the core of my relationship with God. When that is betrayed, when that trust is proven misplaced, or wrong, it shakes everything. Perhaps I am feeling the effects of this. And as we seek to rebuild our community, what does that mean for me?
3. On a lighter note, the sequel is off the ground, at least I will meet my publisher's deadline for the end of this month; it won't be done, but I will have 5000 words for her. Of course, it will be shit, but at least there will be 5000 words of shit. We can work on that from there. I have decided that to gain a new hold on this project I have to ignore the sequel for awhile and focus on something else. I have been contacted by a sci-fi magazine called Neo-Opsis to write a short story for them. I think I can crank it out here in a couple of weeks. I think that will be a good creative vacation. In the meantime I have an artist friend of mine working on 3d models of the ship from the first book. They are incredible. He sent me some drafts today.
So, now I think things will begin to slow down, so I hope I will be able to blog more regularly.
Much has happened, and I have been barely able to touch a keyboard, let alone organize my thoughts into something resembling coherency. So I guess I'll just fill everyone in.
1. The Pastor of the Sol Cafe has resigned. Last Sunday he announced that effective Jan 16 he would no longer be our pastor. Much turmoil ensues. Our community is already reeling from internal tension and full of hurting people (nothing unordinary about that) and many people are leaving or thinking about leaving. Rob feels tired and burnt out. He has been doing Sol Cafe fulltime for six years, and he and his family can do no more. This leaves a considerable leadership vacuum in Sol Cafe, and has forced us to ask the question, "Can we survive without Rob?" If the answer to that is no, then it might be more healthy for us to just end it.
This is tough for me, since Sol Cafe is the first church, including the one I pastored, that I truly care about. But, you know what? I'm tired too. I am not sure that I want to continue. I know that the coming months at Sol will eat my soul alive, but the alternative is worse. So I am neatly trapped. IN the meantime, since the announcement of Rob's resignation, I have been busy meeting with people to gauge feelings and try to encourage and motivate people to think and pray more deeply about what Sol Cafe means to them, where they see the hand of God, and where their own committment is. This has been difficult and draining for me. As for my own heart, I am prepared to go either way. If Sol ends, I can walk away with a measure of peace. If Sol continues, I am willing to commit everything to making sure it works, to rebuilding our community. However, a friend told me that to expect change without changing our behavior is absurd. That is a good point. How can expect Sol to be better this time without making a fundamental change?
2. Earlier this fall I hurt my back really badly. I was bed-ridden for almost a month. I literally could not move, they were going to operate on my back, etc. During that month, NO ONE came to see me, NO ONE called. I felt utterly isolated, completely alone. It got to the point where I had a breakdown. Of course, I never called anyone to come over, and Shirley did come over plenty of times, and she called and so on. However, no one else from my church did. That really hurt me. Shirley has noted that since I have recovered from the injury I have changed in some way, that somehow this injury has really affected me. When she said that I really resonated with what she was saying. I could feel the difference in me twixt the summer and now. I didn't like it. I don't like what I have changed into. So it forces me to ask, how have I changed? How is this affecting everything from my relationship with Shirley to Sol Cafe, to my job, writing and so on? Not to mention my spiritual life. And most importantly, how do I get beyond it? Shirley suggested that the cause was that I felt utterly betrayed by the community. For me community has always been the core of my beliefs, and my beliefs about community form the core of my relationship with God. When that is betrayed, when that trust is proven misplaced, or wrong, it shakes everything. Perhaps I am feeling the effects of this. And as we seek to rebuild our community, what does that mean for me?
3. On a lighter note, the sequel is off the ground, at least I will meet my publisher's deadline for the end of this month; it won't be done, but I will have 5000 words for her. Of course, it will be shit, but at least there will be 5000 words of shit. We can work on that from there. I have decided that to gain a new hold on this project I have to ignore the sequel for awhile and focus on something else. I have been contacted by a sci-fi magazine called Neo-Opsis to write a short story for them. I think I can crank it out here in a couple of weeks. I think that will be a good creative vacation. In the meantime I have an artist friend of mine working on 3d models of the ship from the first book. They are incredible. He sent me some drafts today.
So, now I think things will begin to slow down, so I hope I will be able to blog more regularly.
